S tephanie Robesky has been fortunate enough to score a table for two at Noma — supposedly voted the best restaurant in the world; although I am not sure how any restaurant can achieve such a subjective designation — at the Mandarin Oriental, Tokyo hotel property for her birthday towards the end of this month, when she will be 39 years old.
The problem is that she does not have a dinner date — and that is where you come in.
Criteria
If you fall within the following criteria, you have a chance at being her dinner date:
You live in the Bay Area so we can meet up beforehand to see if it is a fit.
You are single. Like properly single. No attachments.
You are a male.
You are between 28-46.
You know how to use a fork and knife properly.
You have good conversational skills.
You are easy on the eye.
You are able to make that evening & cover your flight / accommodations costs.
Wait a minute…I am reading that last item on the list above…
Solutions — and Why
Stephanie, I have two words for you, and you can choose one, the other — or both:
Well — they are not exactly words; but I digress.
With those two Internet web sites, you can wipe out the first criterion of your potential dinner companion living in the San Francisco Bay Area. A true member of FlyerTalk or Milepoint will visit you as often as necessary from anywhere around the globe to meet with you to earn those frequent flier loyalty program miles — as well as elite qualification miles to attain as high of elite level status next year as possible. Bonus points — literally — if he gets to stay in a hotel instead of your place; and do not bother to pick him up at the airport, as he will most likely rent a car. Yep, you guessed it — more points.
Someone who flies that much will most definitely be single — unless he has a committed partner who is willing to travel with him to all corners of the globe. Perhaps that lucky woman can eventually be you?
You have a great chance of finding a single male between the ages of 28 through 46 years of age on FlyerTalk and Milepoint. Just post that you are a single female who loves to travel. Enough said.
As far as using a knife and fork properly, I cannot guarantee that one — nor can I guarantee that he will be “easy on the eye.” I certainly would not want to see you suffer from periorbital hematoma.
If you are looking for good conversational skills, I suggest you simply read what your prospective dinner companion posts on FlyerTalk or Milepoint, which is arguably more difficult to do than have a conversation in person. Is he polite, respectful and helpful to others? Does he possess an excellent command of the English language? Is his levity humorous to you? Can you understand what he says when he posts that he is an DM on DL but was an FO last year using SM from PRG to SFO or OAK O/W on DL or OK metal with an UG using a GUC to BE on a mileage run with a fuel dump from C2c to C1w?
I can assure you that many members of FlyerTalk and Milepoint are a discriminating bunch. They dine at restaurants such as The French Laundry — an establishment right in your own backyard at which you have already dined — where everyone walks out with clean clothes. Then again, there are also some who view In-N-Out Burger and Waffle House as gourmet dining establishments where everyone walks out with ketchup and syrup stains. Hey — there are even people who exchange wedding vows at Waffle House locations — such as this lucky couple in Gainesville, Florida…
…and if you want to get to Gainesville in Florida, Megabus will take you there for as little as one dollar. Hot dang, Gator Baiter!
Okay…I am getting silly now…I apologize.
Look, Stephanie — I guess what I am attempting to say is that you have a legitimate chance of finding your dream future ex-husband or two on FlyerTalk or Milepoint without having to wade through the millions of bogus applications you have probably already received at your weblog.
This Section is Not For Stephanie to Read…
Hold on, Stephanie — do not look immediately below but rather jump straight to the next section, as I am attempting to give your potential suitors ammunition to at least know what is a Noma, as you stated that “If you don’t know what Noma is then you are pretty much already excluded from the criteria that I am setting forth for this date”:
Psst…guys…do not fly to Denmark to the original Noma location. You will not see Stephanie there. Go to the one in Tokyo. That is located in Japan. No, not Taipan. JAPAN. Not that Japan — the other Japan. Yes. That’s it.
You can expect the meal to consist of a series of small servings followed by larger dishes, showing the best of the seasonal products available to Noma in Tokyo, as their wine pairing will show an emphasis on small-scale producers who have a careful, passionate engagement with the land.
Don’t worry about paying cash or using your miles — Stephanie will pay for your dinner and wine pairing, which totals ¥64,900. That’s almost $548.00! Woo hoo!!!
Okay, Stephanie — You Can Read Again
…and guys — here is what Stephanie likes to do:
Likes to read, watch movies & bad TV, blog, play ukulele, go to theater and lectures, play board games, cook, hang out with bald cats, scuba dive, nerd out on gadgets, travel and eat good food.
Yep — definitely a dream date for a fearless FlyerTalk hunk or a macho Milepoint manly man. You have got it all going on, girl! Bag the right guy and you might get a chance to take up residence with him — literally — for several hours on a future flight operated by Etihad Airways; or spend Christmas in Mogadishu!
How It Works: The Process
If you are interested in the chance to dine with Stephanie — who I do not know from a hole in the wall — at Noma in Tokyo, apply your submission here. No, not that kind of submission. Get your mind out of the gutter.
Stephanie will narrow the competition down to three finalists and schedule an interview…er…I mean meetup — coffee probably, just so that she can stay awake while interviewing…er…I mean meeting you — and then she will select her date by Friday, January 16, 2015.
Summary
I wish Stephanie the best of luck in her search for a suitable dinner companion. Happy birthday to you!
Come to think of it, Jordan Axani might have been the perfect date for you — if your name was Elizabeth Gallagher, that is; and if you were Canadian. See the link posted in item number 10 on the second list in this article to see what I mean…
Hey, Stephanie — by posting this article, have I become “super rad”?!?
