Note: We interrupt The Gate to present to you the following infomercial.
D id you miss out on that lucrative modeling shoot because your chest was too flat? Have you purchased a surplus of bras at a ridiculously low price from the Internet which are just too ample for your current breast size? Not knowing who would be more self-conscious, do some men have larger breasts than you?
Earn 30,800 Avios For Breast Enhancements
Well, this is your lucky day: undergo a procedure for an anatomical bilateral breast increase – that is, breast enhancements — and you will earn 30,800 Avios in addition to busting out your new bust.
Yes, that’s right. Say ta ta to tiny ta-tas and bye bye to bitty bosom bumps and say hello to jumping jugs and massive mammaries — and have more than enough Avios to travel between London and New York round-trip on travel days which are considered off peak to show off your peaks at which others will peek.
Would you rather travel round-trip on peak days between London and New York? Sorry, 30,800 Avios is not enough for that; but you can undergo other procedures — and those pesky Avios will add up in no time.
But Wait — That’s Not All…
For example, you can earn 3,500 Avios for removal of unwanted hair; and you can earn another 4,000 Avios for homologous artificial insemination. Add 1,750 Avios for undergoing a food intolerance test, and voilà! You will have earned enough Avios to travel round-trip between London and New York during peak periods…
…but why stop there? There are select medical and dental products, procedures and services for both men and women from which you can earn Avios. You can undergo reconstructive surgery on your eyelids and earn 21,000 Avios. You can also earn 22,000 Avios for undergoing assisted reproduction with vitro fertilization and intracytoplasmic sperm injection.
How about earning 51,100 Avios for undergoing a prostate laser procedure?
Summary
Actually, if you want or need to undergo any of the above procedures — as well as other select medical and dental products, procedures and services offered through Sanitas, which is a partner of Iberia — you may as well consider earning some frequent flier loyalty program miles in the process. Keep in mind that there are terms and conditions which must be followed in order for the select medical and dental products, procedures and services purchased to be eligible to earn Avios.
Click here and scroll to the bottom to click on Ver tabla de obtención to keep abreast of the complete list of all of the eligible products and services — albeit in Spanish — which you can purchase and earn Avios.
Sorry; but I could not resist getting that one off of my chest and milking it — and thank you to FlyerTalk member ABeautifulPlaceInThe for launching this discussion.
We now bring you back to regular programming currently in progress…
Photograph ©2016 by Brian Cohen.